Don't forget about me...

Lemoore's 25th anniversary, June 13, 2009 = Gooood day, "Hey who's that dude in the blue?!", "Oh he's a cuuutie! Hollaaa", "Hey, ima hook you up with that foo hahah", Referee'ing, "sleeping", "Noooo, I didn't sneak out", Hanford, BBQ'ing, Cranium, Mafia in the dark, Spiders, "That kind of girl", Surprise IM's, Surprise Facebook messages, "With a brother from Long Beach ;)", Surprise phone calls, July 2nd, "Sweetie", "My dear", Meeting my mom, Lunch at BJ's, Forgetting to bring church clothes, Macy's, 80% off?!, "Go get those shoes!", .... ;), You had me at HELLO, Nightly convo's, The question's game, Nightly convo's, The question's game, WE don't break PROMISES, 4:30 am wake up calls, "Nightly convo tonight, okay?", Call me later?, Online shopping, "You can use my camera", 95th Anniversary Weekend, Mixer, McDonald's turned Jack in the Box run, "Ayyye, I'm gonna ask for directions", "Walk on the OTHER side of me", "Okay, FINE, give me your arm!", Kiss me through the Phone by Souljah Boy, "This is how we do in Long Beach", Staying out late at my hotel, BUT outside, SCAN's watching us!, Can you just stay a liiiittle bit longer?, "I'm sleeepy", Lee's Noodle's, Late night adventures, Bad at directions, "WE don't even live here!", Wasting gas in San Jose, nightly convo's, 5:30 am wake up calls, nightly convo's, Don't forget to call me in the morning, No need to rush into things, I like talking to you =], I don't mind the wait. <3




Miss you.
Don't forget me.

Strength

"You are my strength when I grow weary
In time of loneliness and despair
And with your love for me unfailing
You comfort me in every prayer."

Blessed and then some.

I'm truly blessed with amaaaazing friends and family. At times I know I take them fore-granted because I'm literally alwaaays busy with all my church and school stuff, and I don't get a chance to talk to them as much as I would like, and I'm sure the feeling is the same vice versa. I feel like I've taken them even more fore-granted this past month because of my 'emo-ness', and it's obvious that I'm not myself right now, but I'm glad my friends and family always make that extra effort to always check up on me, and continuously do so, even when I don't let them. I love them, thanks for caring you guys <3

I'm slowly letting go and slowly coming into the realization that this whole 'being patient' process might take a while, and like I said, "I'm willing to wait" and I'm sticking to my word, I really thought this was gonna be an easy process, you know, wait a few days, and maybe a week or two at the longest...but people need time to heal, and I can't be as selfish as I would like to be, I'm being considerate to his feelings as he did with mine. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right? But we'll see though, right? Only God knows what the future holds, but I'm praying for bigger and better thangs and to keep me strong no matter what happens...

So last night I was talking to Mhyrees; she just turned 21... She's ONLY a year younger than me, but when she was younger, I thought of her as just this little girl who was annoying, and when I would see her at school or even at church, I would just say HI to be nice, but other times I would just try and avoid her...HAHA Sorry Mhyrees! But I never thought she'd have so much significance in my life. The girl has most def. grown up. It still amazes me with the amount of maturity she has. Even though we're far away from each other, she is always in total 'Mama Mode' and always checking up on me, and is always willing to give me advice but its never too overwhelming and is always considerate of my feelings, especially when I'm hellaa emotional. Last night, it hit me, and she is FORREAAL my sister, we've always said we were adopted sisters, but she IS my sister =] Thaaanks for everything, MAH-RES =]

You feelin' me?

You said you didn't want to see me get hurt,
so does that mean you closed your eyes when I cried?

I wish I had the guts to walk away
and forget about what we had.
But, I can’t because I know you won't come after me,
and I guess that's what hurts the most.

Nobody said it was easy...
no one ever said it would be this hard.

Sometimes I wish I were a little kid again, skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts.

22 years.

For the first time ever in my 22 years of life, I can truly say that I'm HEART BROKEN, and I'm THAT girl...the 'broken hearted girl'. This is one of the most painful feelings in the world, and I don't like it, the feeling feels endless and literally heart pounding pain.

Dear God, please give me the strength to not feel like this anymore...Make me a stronger person, allow US to get through this, allow me to get through this, and most of all, give me the strong Faith and Patience. Amem.

The questions game...

Is this all fun and games to you?
What do you want from me?
Where do we go from here?
Is this how it is?


Miss you. 2 words, that's all.

Come away with me...

I'm really in NEED of a get-away...Fresno is depressing me right now totally putting a downer on my mood, and it's not helping.

Monday, First day of Fall Semester & the surprise of my week...can't say I was excited, and I can't say it made my day, but now I'm wondering, "What now?"...him and I , we're good, so we said...but are WE? I don't know...this is sooo frustrating, endless, tiring, emotional, draining, unpredictable...any more adjectives?